i like i love it when you call.

i seriously have alot to say. thankyou everyone for cheering me up. i love you reina, for making me happy even though i somehow make you two _. i love you jingting, for always being there for me. i love you alvin, for always saying stupid jokes and making me burp. i love you weirong, for always giving me that bojiao face. i love you sara, for going to eat tom yam with me. yeah, so what? they're my new cliques, but at least they are there for me.

i feel sad and disappointed about you. yes you, not you. get what i mean. you say i dont care about you. you say i hung out with someone else because you dont dress up. you say i have my own cliques and i dont care about you. well, i tried to hang out with you. but you gave me the impression that i was an extra, and it didnt matter if i hung out with you all or any other people. last year, i went all the way from my class to your class just to have recess with you. but you were always wasting time, calling your best friend to go downstairs when she didnt want to. i was patient, i waited with you. one day, i decided to stay in my class, and see whether you will come to look for me, but you didnt. and subsequently, the days passed and i didnt go for recess with you anymore. you see? dont blame me that i have my own cliques already because i did try to stay as good friends. you? you also have your own what. you say i didnt hang out with you that day because you dont dress up. after knowing me for 4 years, did you think im like that? a girl who dont hang out with you cos you dont look pretty or what? im sre you know the answers. you gave me the cold shoulders that day. i dont know why too. i think you were distracted by the SGs around us, and whenever i tried to asked you something, i had to ask you multiple times. cos you were always looking around, not concentrating here. nevermind, whatever i say now cannot change the way you think about me. why. but i honestly still treat you as a good friend. believe it or not lor.

now, you. you say i didnt change. why do some people say i change and some say i dont change?! im getting totally annoyed by this.yes i dont change, thats why i can think about the one before you for like many months. now you, i honestly dont know when will it stop. i still dont get what you try to say sometimes. i dont even know what i said to make you say i didnt change. valuable lessons. yeah right. not to fall for a bitch like me? what you said on 22nd march tells me that for the past few months, you were lying about what you said. still valuable lessons. hmph. you told me not to tell anyone about the quarrels. do you know how much pressure is it giving me. argh. nevermind, its all over.

this is quite a long post. and its filled with sadness. and im lying to my dad saying tht im using it to register my ipod ( hell i dont know how to do it ). everything is going so wrong. i dont know what to do. studies, friends, you and you. sometimes i feel really lost. and i cant say them out. i still cry when i think of it. you might treat this as something minor, and part of your growing ups stage. i reflected, but soemtimes i dont see what is wrong. is it because im blind? maybe. i agree that sometimes i give the impression that i dont care. but you know what is 'kou shi xin fei'?sigh. okay, i learned that word while watching ' run papa run' yesterday. typical HK show. fight here fight there. ah-bish. lol. mye is just round the corner. and i only done little revision. damn. im getting SO distracted. all my fault.
bye.